Top 12 quotes from Magic Mike (2012)

Quotes from movie Magic Mike (2012)
 
Joanna:
I don't normally like blondes, I know, but she's really cute.
Mike Martingano:
Yeah, but she's not going to be like you know, our type. You know what I'm saying?
Joanna:
So, you're not into her?
Mike Martingano:
No,no, that's not what I'm saying, she's like, she's a little uptight.
Joanna:
OK, well we're fucking her, not taking her to dinner.
Mike Martingano:
That's not going to happen. She's a dinner type is what I'm trying to say, if you get me.
Joanna:
Oh, OK, um, if you decide you want to share... If you change your mind and put some effort into it, you know my number. And besides you know how much I love to eat.
 
Mike Martingano:
[dressed as a police officer]
Good evening. You live here?
Kim:
Yeah.
Mike Martingano:
Yeah? What's your name?
Kim:
Kim.
Mike Martingano:
Kim, can you move back for me, please?
[enters house full of women]

Mike Martingano:
We keep getting complaints about noise and underage drinking. Everybody sit down, we're gonna be here for a while! You don't have anything sharp on you that I can stick myself with, do you?
Kim:
No.
Mike Martingano:
Good. 'Cause I do!
[rips off pants, women scream]
 
[from trailer]

Mike Martingano:
So you gonna come to the show tonight?
Paige:
No.
Mike Martingano:
You're gonna come to the show tonight.
Paige:
No!
Mike Martingano:
You just said over there that you like the show!
Paige:
That doesn't mean I'm gonna go again!
 
Mike Martingano:
I have, like, $13,000 saved.
Paige:
Wow. That's a lot of ones.
Mike Martingano:
There are some fives in there.
Paige:
Oh, ok. No twenties?
Mike Martingano:
Oh, you don't wanna know what I have to do for twenties.
 
Paige:
Entrepreneur/stripper? Stripper/entrepreneur?
Mike Martingano:
Either one.
Paige:
I was hoping this was all a joke.
Mike Martingano:
It is pretty funny.
 
Dallas:
He's young, good looking...
[about The Kid]

Mike Martingano:
He can't dance for sure.
Dallas:
He can't dance for shit, but that is teachable.
 
Dallas:
Fact is, the law says you cannot touch!
[smiles]

Dallas:
But I think I see a lotta lawbreakers up in this house tonight...
 
Dallas:
[to The Kid]
You are the husband they never had! You are that dreamboat guy that never came along!
 
Mike Martingano:
How pregnant did you get that girl's mouth last night?
 
Dallas:
Will you welcome to the stage, the one, the only... Magic Mike!
 
The Kid:
[from trailer]
Are you hitting on my sister?
 
The Kid:
You're a fucking stripper?
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